My Story

As a mother of three with 15 years of parenting experience, you’d think I’d have it all figured out by now. But the truth is, parenting has been an ongoing journey of learning, growth, and self-discovery.

When I had my first child, I had a clear idea of what kind of parent I wanted to be – the complete opposite of how I had been raised. I was determined to provide the love, attention, and support I felt I never received. But I quickly found myself adopting a rigid approach, enforcing strict routines and discipline. By the time my son turned two, he was incredibly independent – but my friends started calling me “Sergeant Douglas” because I was so focused on maintaining order and structure.

Then came my second child. I tried to apply the same rules and structure, but something was different. She didn’t respond the way my son had. I struggled to understand why my usual methods weren’t working and began to label her as easily distracted, mischievous, and “difficult.”

It wasn’t until she was six that I started questioning myself. I realized that despite my best efforts, nothing I did seemed to help her. There were talks about ADHD, but I resisted the idea – I couldn’t imagine that my child could have ADHD. After some time, research, and finally a diagnosis, I learned that she did indeed have ADHD.

The guilt and shame were overwhelming. I felt like a failure as a mother, believing I had let my daughter down.

I had disciplined her for behaviours that weren’t her fault and hadn’t supported her when the school labelled her as disruptive. My heart broke when she told me that she felt like a “bad” child because of her diagnosis.

But this journey didn’t end in despair. Through my own research, I discovered that my neurodivergent brain had led me to overdrive in seeking answers – and that I too had traits of ADHD and autism. This newfound understanding allowed me to shift my approach to parenting and to better support both my daughter and my son in ways that were tailored to their needs, not mine.

This journey ultimately led me to become an Executive Function Coach, where I learned about the 11 different executive functioning skills we all possess and how they impact neurodivergent brains. This knowledge has helped me not only support my family but also guide others in fostering thriving, supportive relationships.